My husband is wheelchair bound and now, Homebound. He could not get himself up from the toilet so I could pull up his depends. Finally, after much tugging and pulling I barely managed to get him onto the wheelchair. I am 80 He weighs over 200 pounds and is 82. I know they have commodes for this but between 2 wheelchairs, bed rails, shower chair, and lift chair, my home is looking like a hospital. He wets the bed every day (and his chair) I live here too and I hate the idea of a commode. Where do I put it after he uses it ? But this is about dressing him. He cannot stand and the few times he attempts it, he leans over so much, there is no way I can pull his depends up and pants. It is so frustrating. I do not think any homecare worker could do what I do and to be honest, I do not want a man in my home to help. I would feel uncomfortable. I know he needs to be in a facility but he does not want to go. What a dilemma I am in. Any suggestions???
No one WANTS to go into a facility. But for the best for both of you, I really think that is what must happen.
I wonder if you can enlist the help of your doctor? Tell them your situation and ask if it is reasonable for you to handle this on your own. Of course, they will say absolutely not! Then, maybe they can help you get things moving in the right direction.
Do you have any children or other family who can help you, at least for the short term before you can get this straightened out (meaning get him moved to a facility)? Beg them for help, for YOU. He doesn't want help? Fine. But you need help. Who is doing the cooking and the cleaning, etc. etc.? You could certainly use help with that at the very least. But that is just the tip of the iceberg since the needs here are sooo much more than those basic daily living activities.
Make some phone calls and get yourself some help. I'm not saying it's easy, but I think it would be for the best. Good luck.
https://www.buckandbuck.com/mens-adaptive.html
https://www.silverts.com/mens-adaptive-clothing/
Once I had some samples to go by I was able to alter some of my mom's existing clothes.