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Acknowledgment of Disclosures and Authorization
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid. We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour. APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment. You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
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Mostly Independent
Your loved one may not require home care or assisted living services at this time. However, continue to monitor their condition for changes and consider occasional in-home care services for help as needed.
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Good thing...Bad thing. She will not know Mothers day from any other day, But truthfully shouldn't EVERY day be Mother's day, Father's day, Grandparent's day, Children's day...and so on. My Mom died when I was pretty young and every day I wish she were here, my Dad died a few years after she did and again every day I wish they could both see me/know me as an adult. So to have 1 "special" day is nice but to treat them the way you would on their 'special" day every day is more of an honor. Spend time with Mom, spend time with Dad and enjoy the moments you have while you have them. Bring Mom a smile, hold hands, give her a hug, a kiss and a thank you. Even if she was not the greatest Mom YOU have learned something from her. You either learned to be like her or how to try to avoid the pitfalls. YOU learned to be loving and caring or you learned how not to be mean, spiteful, needy and vindictive. Take these lessons and pass them on.
You are a gem. But I have to say as well, that some of us are working, frazzled, exhausted from all the details and responsibilities...and it becomes a challenge to put forth much more effort than on typical day/week. Not that I'm sure many of us don't try.
Agingparents3, one year I bought my Mom one of those super large Mother's Day cards, they are usually 1 foot by 2 feet. She got the biggest kick out of that. The card could be set anywhere in her room and she could still see it ;)
A colorful bouquet of fresh cut flowers. They liven up a room, and have a nice scent. They can also be thrown out after being enjoyed, and don't add to the clutter.
I struggled with this when my mom's vascular dementia started worsening. Holidays are meaningless to her now, but I don't like to skip them. Instead of buying her something now, I take her out for a long drive and we have lunch and just spend time together. I spend time with her all the time, but I try to make this day especially about making memories - really memories for myself.
My mom is almost 90 and still lives at home. She doesn’t want stuff and is allergic to flowers. I live over 1000 miles away from her so... The last few years I have had things done at her home to help her. I had a toilet replaced. The garage door opener fixed. Painted her bathroom when I visited, etc. I was the driving force at getting her some in home assistance a few hours a week. She has someone come in for four hours once a week to do light cleaning, cooking, shopping, she gets her hair washed and her toenails done. She also gets some companionship out of it and it gives. My sister a break.
I agree with one of the other posters. Yeah, I am sure she does wear the same clothes every day. That's quite common.
This is what I bring to my 91 year old mother.
Really soft nightgowns, pajamas or bathrobes (bathrobes with snaps or zipper, and not too long), in the colors she likes. She may not seem to care, and resist at first, but I bet you will be surprised when she starts wearing them.
Same for just short or long sleeved tops, in the colors she likes. Elderly people especially with dementia tend to wear the same clothing day after day. But, they also get those clothes stained and they don't see the stains. Every 3-4 months, I bring my 91 year old mother a couple of black or white or black/white striped long sleeved cotton hip length tops......all cotton, or maybe 80% cotton and 20% polyester, just to make sure she has what she wants; and she always wears them. And, then I can get rid of the ones that have stains that cannot be removed.
Also, pull up pants. You may need to get them shortened but you can get all cotton or almost all cotton in black or navy usually at Walmart.
I happened to just be reading thru here - I'm an elder not yet needing care but reading to learn what may lie ahead. I loved all your suggestions for your Mom. This aging thing creeps up on one and you sound like you really understand it.
My Mom has been in MC for 4 years now. One of the things I've given her that she really likes is a clock that's basically made for dementia patients. It gives the day of the week, date and time. Just google clocks for dementia patients and it'll pull quite a few.
I have had the same problem! My mother has had everything and wants nothing. BUT she love Shrimp Cocktail and will suck it down like a Dyson Vacuum. SO I now just get her her favorite food:)
My Mom is 91, and in dementia care in advanced stage. The CVS in town has a sock rack that carries themed socks for the different holidays and seasons. I keep her clothes etc. all year as she needs and anything else that comes up. Anyway, I picked up several pairs at Halloween, with pumpkins, black cats etc. and they were such a big with her that I've continued as the holidays roll around. She loves the colors and pictures and helps her a little identifying what time of the year it is. Kind of like a walking calender. One other thing I found was small stuffed cats. She always adored her cats over the years and terribly misses them and their love and company. I've given her few small stuffed ones that she adores. In her altered reality this was a perfect solution. Hope this helps you. We are all on a journey with no road map and not enough Kleenex. Best wishes to all of you. Happy Mothers Day to those of us who are now the ' mothers ' to our moms.
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
My Mom died when I was pretty young and every day I wish she were here, my Dad died a few years after she did and again every day I wish they could both see me/know me as an adult. So to have 1 "special" day is nice but to treat them the way you would on their 'special" day every day is more of an honor.
Spend time with Mom, spend time with Dad and enjoy the moments you have while you have them.
Bring Mom a smile, hold hands, give her a hug, a kiss and a thank you.
Even if she was not the greatest Mom YOU have learned something from her. You either learned to be like her or how to try to avoid the pitfalls. YOU learned to be loving and caring or you learned how not to be mean, spiteful, needy and vindictive. Take these lessons and pass them on.
This is what I bring to my 91 year old mother.
Really soft nightgowns, pajamas or bathrobes (bathrobes with snaps or zipper, and not too long), in the colors she likes. She may not seem to care, and resist at first, but I bet you will be surprised when she starts wearing them.
Same for just short or long sleeved tops, in the colors she likes. Elderly people especially with dementia tend to wear the same clothing day after day. But, they also get those clothes stained and they don't see the stains. Every 3-4 months, I bring my 91 year old mother a couple of black or white or black/white striped long sleeved cotton hip length tops......all cotton, or maybe 80% cotton and 20% polyester, just to make sure she has what she wants; and she always wears them. And, then I can get rid of the ones that have stains that cannot be removed.
Also, pull up pants. You may need to get them shortened but you can get all cotton or almost all cotton in black or navy usually at Walmart.
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