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Who are you caring for?
Which best describes their mobility?
How well are they maintaining their hygiene?
How are they managing their medications?
Does their living environment pose any safety concerns?
Fall risks, spoiled food, or other threats to wellbeing
Are they experiencing any memory loss?
Which best describes your loved one's social life?
Acknowledgment of Disclosures and Authorization
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid. We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour. APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment. You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
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Mostly Independent
Your loved one may not require home care or assisted living services at this time. However, continue to monitor their condition for changes and consider occasional in-home care services for help as needed.
Remember, this assessment is not a substitute for professional advice.
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Pretty much the same way you get to Carnegie Hall...Practice!
I'm not meaning to sound rude, emotions are difficult things to control, and the best way to become less emotional about something is redundancy. Keep chatting with you dad, you know he loves it when you do! you'll make it, i promise!
With what your dad has---you have to resign yourself to the fact that the tables have now turned---and you are the Adult, and you dad is regressing. It may not be an easy thing to do, accepting this change, but there are no options other than to accept the situation.
You might try to talk to your dad about simple matters, and see if he is grasping what you say, and then take things from there.
Reminicing with pictures, old photo's and the past....may bring back some happy moments for him-in which you both can share..There may even be some activities you can engage your dad in doing. Your physician or neurologist can help you along these lines, as well as the Alzheimer's Association.
Lori-i do not think there is an easy fix with the situation, and learning as much as you can about the disease, will help you to understand and to cope. There are also many groups out there, as well as this forum-take advantage of as many as you can....you are not alone.
Good luck on your caregiving journey and let us know of your progress.
I don't depend on past "conversation" history with Mom any more. I'm lucky to get "Yum" and a yes / no out of her. She's been nonconversational since I started caring for her almost 8 years ago.
I realized that if she were to have a valuable valued life, I had to deliver it on a tray. She would not pick up and run with it. I'm sure I could expand my 'offerings,' but what has worked so far is birdwatching and then building a table across my kitchen door, where she sits for a few hours a day and throws out peanuts to the squirrels and birdseed for crows, jays, and sparrows. We share in this with comments like, "There's one now! Isn't she cute? Look she's standing up and looking at you!" These are my comments. Her comments are "Here's a peanut for you honey. Come get your peanuts. Look at that."
Our TV time is mostly DVDs of repeatable and meaningful shows...for her. Andre Rieu's English language videos (especiall the new Australia one and the Radio City Music Hall) are seen dozens of times. Each one is two hours! So we enjoy that together. She often conducts along, exercise.
We play catch with Elmo Hot Tomato toy. We read children's books together, especially ones with theme of inclusiveness.
So, I found things that we'd both enjoy, and build on that. Rieu got me to try Dudamel. She loves him, and we'll watch Eroica. Sometimes we surf YouTube together to see music videos. I have video of her conducting the B minor mass. So this is beyond "Oh, Suzanna," this is deep appreciation for the classics.
It is frustrating on drives to be a one-gal blab machine. I wasn't sad that Mom wasn't conversant any more. I was angry that I was stuck away from my brilliant friends (writers, physicists, grammy award winning musicians). When first caregiving Mom, moving away from my 20-year home, it literally took me three months to have a conversation with anyone. Nada. Oh, this conversation happened because my friend back home connected to a Jungian scholar who needed a ride to the airport. So I could at least realize I was still bright.
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
I'm not meaning to sound rude, emotions are difficult things to control, and the best way to become less emotional about something is redundancy.
Keep chatting with you dad, you know he loves it when you do! you'll make it, i promise!
With what your dad has---you have to resign yourself to the fact that the tables have now turned---and you are the Adult, and you dad is regressing. It may not be an easy thing to do, accepting this change, but there are no options other than to accept the situation.
You might try to talk to your dad about simple matters, and see if he is grasping what you say, and then take things from there.
Reminicing with pictures, old photo's and the past....may bring back some happy moments for him-in which you both can share..There may even be some activities you can engage your dad in doing. Your physician or neurologist can help you along these lines, as well as the Alzheimer's Association.
Lori-i do not think there is an easy fix with the situation, and learning as much as you can about the disease, will help you to understand and to cope. There are also many groups out there, as well as this forum-take advantage of as many as you can....you are not alone.
Good luck on your caregiving journey and let us know of your progress.
Hap
I realized that if she were to have a valuable valued life, I had to deliver it on a tray. She would not pick up and run with it. I'm sure I could expand my 'offerings,' but what has worked so far is birdwatching and then building a table across my kitchen door, where she sits for a few hours a day and throws out peanuts to the squirrels and birdseed for crows, jays, and sparrows. We share in this with comments like, "There's one now! Isn't she cute? Look she's standing up and looking at you!" These are my comments. Her comments are "Here's a peanut for you honey. Come get your peanuts. Look at that."
Our TV time is mostly DVDs of repeatable and meaningful shows...for her. Andre Rieu's English language videos (especiall the new Australia one and the Radio City Music Hall) are seen dozens of times. Each one is two hours! So we enjoy that together. She often conducts along, exercise.
We play catch with Elmo Hot Tomato toy. We read children's books together, especially ones with theme of inclusiveness.
So, I found things that we'd both enjoy, and build on that. Rieu got me to try Dudamel. She loves him, and we'll watch Eroica. Sometimes we surf YouTube together to see music videos. I have video of her conducting the B minor mass. So this is beyond "Oh, Suzanna," this is deep appreciation for the classics.
It is frustrating on drives to be a one-gal blab machine. I wasn't sad that Mom wasn't conversant any more. I was angry that I was stuck away from my brilliant friends (writers, physicists, grammy award winning musicians). When first caregiving Mom, moving away from my 20-year home, it literally took me three months to have a conversation with anyone. Nada. Oh, this conversation happened because my friend back home connected to a Jungian scholar who needed a ride to the airport. So I could at least realize I was still bright.